Leaving them Hanging

Anne Geddes is evil. There, I've said it. Actually, I've said that a lot, but never to anyone who cared to disagree, or even had an opinion on the matter. Whoever can look at a helpless, sleeping newborn and stuff it in a flower pot dressed as a bug for personal gain is one twisted chica. And thanks to her, turning babies into saccharine objet d' art is a new genre of art-for-profit.


Enter this example of DIY infant torture portraiture: the Hanging Cocoon Sling Stork Pouch photo prop.

Babies are marvelous; their faces exude a calm, exquisite beauty of life and wonderment. And what could be more beautiful than taking that simplicity and dangling it in a loosely knit produce bag? Surely, babies enjoy swinging precariously in an airy sack.


I'm pretty sure the reason these photos are always taken of babies while they're sleeping is because, were they awake, they'd be screaming. Honestly, this can't be comfortable. Babies belong in sleepers and loving arms and comfy prams - not flower pots or so-called stork pouches. Take the dog's word for it - he's so cozy in his stork pouch he's ready to bite someone in the ass.